In college I had a friend named Anna. She was extremely intelligent in the academic sense; she even got a full scholarship for it, which is rare at Messiah. And I thought she was just plain awesome, not because she was smart, but because her outlook on life was so different from anybody else I had ever known.
You see, Anna had grown up as a MK (missionary kid), though I'm not sure which country she grew up in, I'm pretty sure it was somewhere in Africa. So her values and ideals were shaped by an entirely different culture from the me-me-me of American culture. I always found conversations with her were refreshing.
What struck me the most about Anna was her opinion on the concept of beauty. As far as I could tell, she put absolutely no stock in it. She could care less what she looked like, or what others looked like, and did not understand why girls wore makeup or spent hours on their hair, or sat in front of mirrors, she did not even have a mirror growing up! I probably would have described her as "average-looking", not that it would make a difference to her, she dressed well, but did not spend an exorbitant amount of time on preparing herself for the day. It was so different from all the other girls, including myself, I knew who were constantly complaining that their nose was too big, or their hair was too curly, or why couldn't they lose 5 pounds, etc, etc.
I often wish I could be more like Anna. I spend far too much time worrying about my looks, and thinking that I don't look good enough. I'm too fat, I have too many freckles, my skin is too white, I'm too short, etc. But WHY? If only we could live in a world without mirrors, and without constant judgement, and the worst part is, the harshest judgement is not from others, but ourselves. I wonder how I can help Grace growing up in this society to be more like Anna . . . I want her to know she is beautiful :) Looks aren't everything, and shouldn't really be anything at all . . .
You are beautiful sister :) And I love your freckles!
ReplyDeleteI can't speak to what may or may not help Grace, but I know that for me, personally, never being ridiculed at home for how I looked was helpful. My parents allowing me to not worry about my looks helped me know that yeah, it's nice to sometimes get dressed up but on the whole, what's it matter? It also helped that I had friends that didn't care much about that. If Grace is surrounded by people who love based on a person's character & personality, looks will be secondary in her life - always. All of these things you know, and I'm sure you'll raise her to find beauty on the inside, not so much on the outside.